1. You should have known I would be taking my sweet ass time updating my website during these busy concertgoing months. Fuck, I can update this shit later.

2. You should be happy I even have a website, you d-bagging motherfucker! Why do you even care enough in the first place? It's pretty pathetic. You have too much time on your hands and are a waste of life. Seriously, you suck. Yea, I'm talking about you.

3. A whole bunch of shit is still yet to be added (although I did add a ton of photos, if you're in to that kind of stuff), and if I decide to wait another month (or five) to update this website again, fuckin' deal with it.

Other than that, I've been doing great! How'z bout you?

Sincerely,
Dipshit McGee

There's this club that a few select people are members of. This club doesn't have monthly meetings. They don't even have any official record of members. All members of this club have been known to have the excessive need to "get down" and be "all types of Funky" at a moment's notice. And that's "Funky" with a capital F.

This club's chosen color is yellow and they advocate the importance of lots of potassium in your diet. But they don't advocate too much. That is, they won't get in your face if you ain't getting enough potassium in your diet. No ordinary person can even fathom the extraordinary amount of skill and dedication required to actually become a member until they don the necessary ensemble.

Once upon a time, at Bonnaroo last year, a certain distinguished gentleman by the name of Kyle W. Baker donned such apparel and joined that special club. Throughout the late-night set of Karl Denson's Tiny Universe and at various other moments during the heady rock festival, Kyle W. Baker entertained the masses with his tomfoolery and shenana-bananagans.

And Baker indeed did make an impression that fateful Tennessee weekend. So much that he took under his wing a student that he proclaimed would bring a new era to the already remarkable saga known as Bananaman.

Without further ado, I present to you the latest member of this exclusive club...

It may be interesting to note that the Bananaman at Summercamp was completely naked under his peels. I'm not sure if there's a special club for this honor and I don't plan on finding out anytime soon. Sorry for the lame and unneccessary video commentary.

My crazy birthday weekend is now complete. I'm now 26 and more immature and irresponsible than ever! So what does that mean?! It's time to plan a trip to JAPAN!!!

Rumor has it that Umphrey's McGee is gonna be there and Red Hot Chili Peppers and The Strokes are already confirmed! Fuji Rock Festival...I will find a way! I must! It is my destiny!

My boss said the ladies are nice there too. Here's hoping he can foot part of the bill.

I'm gonna be having some contests soon on my website for merchandise and even tickets to concerts. Anyways, I haven't been certain as to what contest I should setup. Things like an egg toss and a raging game of Chutes and Ladders are out of question cause it's gonna be hard to get everyone in the same building as the same time.

Then Broder came up with the perfect idea! We should have a spelling bee! How do we solve the problem of getting people together? I thought I'd brilliantly figured out how to get around that problem....we can have it online and do it through instant messanger!

Everyone's first word is...."dumbass." As in, Keith's a dumbass.

A side note...the other nite, Nick Gregor pulled the ultimate "Gregor" and fell asleep during the credit of the movie. He didn't even make it past the fucking words! Hehe.

So I met a guy at the Black Crowes show that goes to an average of 140 shows a year. Average! He does this every year! He said he went to 40 concerts when he was 9 years old. This guy is nuts, not me. He's nuts. I'm 100% sane (ok, not really).

The guy had ZERO sense of humor though. I tried cracking a joke with him but he didn't even realize it was a joke. He thought I was just having a conversation with him about something. Everything about the guy was more "square" than I'd ever imagine for someone who goes to so many concerts. Which worries me...will I lose my sense of humor at some point during my 100 concerts?! Did I ever have one in the first place?!

Anyways, the guy made my website and my goals seem feeble and insignificant. Kinda bummed me out in a way, even though I've always known there are fiends of music that go to way more shows than I do. I just figured they all had dreads and weren't so uptight.

I still press on. Maybe I should go for 150 instead and stick it to that loser.

Have you noticed how I tend to not update the website for 2 weeks then, when I do update it, there's all these posts from various days during those 2 weeks? Yea, and I've also edited posts that I've done in the past too. Typical douchebag maneuver, agreed? So, I'm off to the Crowes concert tonite. I have a ton of ideas for posts from the past two weeks that I'm sure I'll be posting before the weekend (SUMMERCAMP!). Until then, here's a lovely picture of me from Mother's Day. Enjoy!

Congratulations to Michael Barrett. Not only did you get leveled at home plate by a catcher who's far superior to you in every facet of the game, but you couldn't handle the embarrassment so you had to sucker punch him like the "cockersucker extraordinaire" we all knew you were. What a fuckin' baby. It's not like AJ can't handle you "slapping" him. Dude's a professional wrestler. Anyways....If I see Michael Barrett on the streets of Chicago, I'm gonna sucker punch him in honor of AJ.

Today's Interesting Fact Of The Day: The last time the Chicago Cubs won the World Series, Old Style was actually called New Style.

On the way home today I noticed a truck with an attachment usually used for horses and farm animals. After looking closer at the animal in the cage, I realized it was a camel. At this moment, I got extraordinarily excited and - even though the truck was driving slowly in the right lane - I decided to drive behind it until I hit my exit.

This was probably one of the coolest drives home from work ever. The camel kept on looking at me, then left, and then right. It looked like it was enjoying the ride. I'm such a douchebag I actually was waving to it at one point. Am I a loser or what?

This reminds me of the time I rode a camel in Israel and one of the people I was with almost got her hand bit off. On a side note, what's up with that "holding water in your hump" thingy these camels got going for them? How cool is that?! Camels fucking lucked out in that department.

If you don't know me personally you'd probably assume that there's no interest in my life more important to me than music and going to concerts. You'd be wrong. My first love is the Chicago White Sox.

Ever since I can remember, I've always wanted to see the White Sox win the World Series. I would have done almost anything if I knew it would guarantee I got to see the White Sox win the World Series. Now, I don't have to "cut my left arm off" or "get ran over by a bus," things I would have done if someone guaranteed to me that I'd get to see my team win it all. Thanks to Jerry Reinsdorf, Kenny Williams and Ozzie Guillen, my dream has already come true. I can't count how many times I've cried seeing or hearing footage from the last out of last year's Sox World Series. Anyways, If the Sox didn't win it last year, I probably wouldn't be seeing 100 concerts this year. I'd be at home watching 75-100 games on TV, like I've been doing for the majority of my life.

As much as I'd like to think that where I sat on my couch affected the outcome of each playoff game last year, I had no part helping the Sox win last year. Being at the Pierzynski "dropped ball" game and the Konerko/Podsednik game of the World Series didn't lead to a White Sox winner. Unfortunately, being a die-hard White Sox fan who's been waiting his entire life for one purpose -- to bring a championship to the South Side -- doesn't mean I get a ring. That plain sucks, but I understand.

Luckily, the White Sox will most likely win it all again. Our team is that good, and we have Ozzie Guillen, so it's basically wrapped up. It won't be easy, but neither is seeing 100 concerts in a year. I'm confident that we'll hold up that trophy again. So, since I don't have to worry too much about the White Sox this year, I can do something different to entertain myself (and others). I'm still following the White Sox on a daily basis, but now I've got other goals, like 100 concerts for instance.

So, what's the point of today's blog? There's two points. First, it's because of the White Sox that I'm gonna see 100 concerts this year. Second, I still fucking hate the Chicago Cubs with a passion.

You see the strange mix of concerts I'm going to the next few weeks?! It starts out jambanding with Bisco tomorrow night, then I'm balling with VIP seats to the Chicago Symphony Orchestra. Then I make a complete 180 and checkout Tool, which I have a feeling will be very odd for me yet pimp at the same time. The following week, I'm gonna see Pearl Jam for the first time. I've been a Pearl Jam fan too long a time to have not seen them. After revisiting the jamband scene with Groovatron, I'll be checking out Cornmeal, a fucking amazing bluegrass band. Because my taste in music is so odd, the rest of May gets straight ridiculous and culminates with my second festival, Summercamp, a few hours away in Peoria, Illinois.

Can you say "Fuck Yea?!"

I got some internet radio love from a sweet show out of the Boston Area, Tufts University in particular. 100Concerts is starting to get some pub. The show is ran by Terrapin Jake and is called Runaway Golfcart Marathon (sweet name, eh?). It's every Wednesday from 9:00-11:00 CST. Terrapin Jake plays a great mix of the dopest bands that know how to jam - new and old. I highly recommend checking out the show. The live stream is available at WMFO.org.

"Mother Fucker, Jesus Christ?! Why the hell do you have to swear so friggin' much? Your poor friggin' mom can't even go out in public. When she does drag her sorry ass out of the house she has to wear one of those friggin' bhurka's (like the "gals" wear in Afghanistan) so nobody will recognize her. And what a flattering picture of me. No seriously, there's no effing way I look that heavy in real life. Seriously man, you have to let everyone know I'm 6'2", weigh 180 and even though I'm north of 50 yrs old I can still kick your ass."